How Are You?

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(A Girls Night Out with my friend, Angela)

“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” James 1:19, New International Version

Three simple words can change a person’s entire day. Three simple words can communicate that you care. I think we all have been guilty of talking “on and on” about ourselves and failing to ask the person on the other end, “How are you?” Truthfully, we can become all consumed with “self” and forget that a living, breathing person is on the other end of our conversation. Who knows, maybe they are hurting or in need of encouragement. If we do get past our self-focus and actually ask the question, we then face another dilemma of getting the “AUTOMATIC RESPONSE.” I can’t tell you how many times I have asked, “How are you?” only to here the quick response, “Oh, I’m fine.” Yet, if we were honest that “automatic response” is not always the truth! Why do we insist on pretending that we have it all together when God knows that we are about to fall apart?

So let me be the first one to ask you today:
“How are you?”
“No REALLY, How are you?”
“How can I pray for you?”
“How can I minister to your needs?”

Take just a minute and answer these questions – Go ahead, I’ll wait right here until you are finished. Okay, now that you have shared you heart with me: “How do you feel?” Some of you may have tears in your eyes and others of you may be smiling. But, no matter the response – know that I genuinely care. I want to know how you are doing today. If you need a listening hear, please feel free to click on my contact page and send me an email. I would love to hear from you and I will agree with you in prayer.

My genuine care is my gift to you this day. Now it is up to you to pass it on!

Prayer:
Lord, please forgive me for being self-centered and failing to see the needs of others around me. Help me to pour into someone’s life today. I commit to tell You everything I am feeling and thinking deep within my heart. Thank you for always being available to me. And by the way Jesus, How are you today? How can I pray for the concerns on your heart and mind? Jesus, You are always there for me and I want to be here for You today. I give you permission to use my life to be a blessing.” Amen.

6 Comment(s)

  1. I think why many do response “I’m fine” is that they do not want to bother others with their problems. Secondly, people watch other people’s body language a lot. And, so they do not share. Thirdly, is finding that particular person who is geniune and whats to help. However, we have to open to others so they can feel appreciated and want to open their hearts to us and then pray and encourage them. I believe we miss a lot of people who are hurting when we are not open to others. I am glad that you spoke on that today. Because, I was just reading something on that same topic.

    Stephanie derolus | Jun 4, 2007 | Reply

  2. Reading about community in John Ortberg’s book he talks about being safe enough to show warts and all. In “Seven Highly Effective Ways to Win and Influence People” he says the best way to build relationship is to let them know you need them. Give them a way to help you. When they feel needed they feel useful.

    Yet It is difficult as leaders, sometimes, to let others know you need them. Still sometimes the best relationships are based on comparing warts! 😉 (Not that we are to wallow in our problems but helping to carry each others load.)

    You’re Not Heavy, You’re my Sister.

    Angel | Jun 5, 2007 | Reply

  3. So true…..I have to contiously decide to ask others how they’re doing and then sit quietly while they respond. Listening is a skill that requires effort! It’s so important to be careful to realize that “it’s not about me”.

    By the way, thank you for asking!

    Brigette Wagner | Jun 5, 2007 | Reply

  4. Your questions come in a season where the wounds are healed, but the marks are still visible. Still, I rejoice in Christians who genuinely care and women who are divinely placed in my path. Thank you Jesus!

    With each experience, I learn and grow. I’m asking God to bring the right relationships and to build those I already have had throughout the years. And, for the estranged friendship, to be renewed if it is His will.

    Friendships among woman are necessary for our survival, though I now know that these relationships must take there proper place in life’s priorities.

    I’m well thank you and giving God the glory for all He has done, and continues to do on my behalf.

    How are YOU? Really!

    Rosemarie | Jun 6, 2007 | Reply

  5. Great post! I can tell the genuine warmth and love you have for others in your spirit and throughout your blog. May the Lord bless you this week and always.

    Angel

    Angel ( Pearls of Wisdom) | Jun 14, 2007 | Reply

  6. Hey Tracy. I’m visiting via Leigh Gray’s site. Happy Belated birthday!! Mine was the 26th and I turned 39 so I understand COMPLETELY the crisis!! God is good and He keeps letting me participate in things that remind me that I’m not as old as I think I am! haha He’s so funny!! Love that about Him!

    Have a blessed birthday week!!!

    Valarie | Jun 28, 2007 | Reply

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